randog311 7,190 Posted September 21, 2018 Share Posted September 21, 2018 Why is it that our Noses Run and our Feet Smell... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 21, 2018 Share Posted September 21, 2018 At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he's adopted? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian_at_HHH 2,607 Posted September 21, 2018 Share Posted September 21, 2018 3 minutes ago, randog311 said: At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he's adopted? Whenever he asks - don't make him beg. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 21, 2018 Share Posted September 21, 2018 17 minutes ago, Brian_at_HHH said: Whenever he asks - don't make him beg. Perhaps if I lock him in the Trunk (@ night/ 72 F) for awhile first to take the "edge off" first... "In jest of course" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sk1Bum 9,803 Posted September 21, 2018 Share Posted September 21, 2018 (edited) 2 hours ago, randog311 said: At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he's adopted? D4mn. Rosa just told me that I'm adopted. I can't complain though, she sure is good to her human. Thank God she didn't insist on getting me clipped. Edited September 21, 2018 by Sk1Bum 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 22, 2018 Share Posted September 22, 2018 54 minutes ago, Sk1Bum said: D4mn. Rosa just told me that I'm adopted. I can't complain though, she sure is good to her human. Thank God she didn't insist on getting me clipped. Did she get you "Chipped"? So that you could be returned home when you run away to hang with the Street People... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sk1Bum 9,803 Posted September 22, 2018 Share Posted September 22, 2018 3 minutes ago, randog311 said: Did she get you "Chipped"? Nah, she knows I'll come home to eat and get my ears scratched. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 22, 2018 Share Posted September 22, 2018 More like a "Wet Willie" with her tongue... ROFL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 23, 2018 Share Posted September 23, 2018 She wanted a Cat, I didn't want a Cat... ..so we compromised and got a Cat;( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian_at_HHH 2,607 Posted September 23, 2018 Share Posted September 23, 2018 25 minutes ago, randog311 said: ..so we compromised and got a Cat;( Only one? I got 5! (For the record, I'm actuality to blame) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 23, 2018 Share Posted September 23, 2018 Got Two, the Female was my late brother's Cat, he had two, his Male stopped eating... $1,300 + Vet bill later. Very Sad ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 23, 2018 Share Posted September 23, 2018 What did the Elephant say to the naked Man... How do you breathe through that thing? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 24, 2018 Share Posted September 24, 2018 Your blow up date saw you naked and self deflated ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 25, 2018 Share Posted September 25, 2018 What do you call the stuff that collects in panties? Klitylitter... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian_at_HHH 2,607 Posted September 25, 2018 Share Posted September 25, 2018 Arguing with a woman is like reading the Software License Agreement. In the end, you ignore everything and click “I agree.” 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 25, 2018 Share Posted September 25, 2018 How can you tell if a "Gold Wing" rider is having an affair? His Passenger's helmet won't match... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrummerJuice 1,278 Posted September 25, 2018 Share Posted September 25, 2018 I may have to steal this one! 1 hour ago, Brian_at_HHH said: Arguing with a woman is like reading the Software License Agreement. In the end, you ignore everything and click “I agree.” 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 25, 2018 Share Posted September 25, 2018 With the rise of Autonomous Vehicles, it's only a matter of time before someone writes a Country Song where His Truck leaves Him to... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 25, 2018 Share Posted September 25, 2018 A Pirate walks into a Bar with a Steering Wheel jammed into his pants... Bartender says: "Um, Sir- you have a Steering Wheel jammed into your drawers?" Pirate : "Arrrgh, it's drivin' me nuts!" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 25, 2018 Share Posted September 25, 2018 Back in the day, the "Catch Phrase" for Bill Cosby was: " There's always room for Yello" Today the "Catch Phrase" for Bill Cosby is: "There's always room for Yello Shots and Qualudes"... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrummerJuice 1,278 Posted September 26, 2018 Share Posted September 26, 2018 What's the difference between light and hard? I can fall asleep with a light on! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 He slapped his 2 inches on the examination table and the Doctor asked: "What's wrong with it? "It's swollen!" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,190 Posted September 29, 2018 Share Posted September 29, 2018 Doctor's Office Receptionist to Patient: All of our Records are now Electronic... Just fill out these twelve forms... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daddyjt 8,587 Posted September 29, 2018 Share Posted September 29, 2018 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian_at_HHH 2,607 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 A A bloke walks into a Glasgow, Scotland library and says to the prim librarian, 'Excuse me Miss, do ye hae any books on suicide?' The librarian stops doing her tasks, looks at him - over the top of her glasses and says, 'Buggeroff, ye'll no bring it back!' 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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