danowood 2,167 Posted September 10, 2015 Posted September 10, 2015 Nine Important Facts To Remember As We Grow Older #9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world. #8 Life is sexually transmitted. #7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. #6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich. #5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years. #4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing. #3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. #2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal. #1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow. 9
4krow 7,329 Posted September 12, 2015 Posted September 12, 2015 Today is the oldest that I have ever been
Maddmaster 1,028 Posted September 12, 2015 Posted September 12, 2015 Never pass up a bathroom Don't waste a hardon Never trust a fart Those are from the movie Bucket List
sKiZo 186 Posted September 12, 2015 Posted September 12, 2015 The ground keeps getting farther away ... This comes to mind after spending a couple days crawling around under my car ... <G> Also why lately, I'm more into dragging a trailer around with the truck instead of with the motorcycle. Big difference between sleeping in a real full size bed and a tent - even if it DOES have an Aerobed, it's still a long way down to the floor. BEFORE > > AFTER .> > Betcha yall never thought a basic Ranger could haul a 26 foot camper. Helps that my CombiCamp only weighs in at 500 pounds ... it's MUCH bigger on the inside! 1
PDR 1,194 Posted September 12, 2015 Posted September 12, 2015 Gout pills are a form of Viagra.... And here I thought it was all the exercise I've been doing lately.....
loner_t 2,571 Posted September 12, 2015 Posted September 12, 2015 ... it's MUCH bigger on the inside! TARDIS has arrived...
jldeni 449 Posted September 12, 2015 Posted September 12, 2015 Growing old is mandatory...growing up is optional. Just sayin'.
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