randog311 7,223 Posted September 12, 2018 Share Posted September 12, 2018 "The problem isn't that Obesity runs in your Family... The problem is that nobody in your Family runs"... Unknown 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 13, 2018 Share Posted September 13, 2018 "My Father is Schizophrenic, but he's good people." - Stewart Francis 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 13, 2018 Share Posted September 13, 2018 "The New England Journal of Medicine reports agrees that 9 out of 10 Doctors agrees that 1 out of 10 Doctors is an Idiot. " -Jay Leno 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 13, 2018 Share Posted September 13, 2018 "Katelin: I was going to tell you a joke about my vagina, but you will never get it." -Unknown 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 13, 2018 Share Posted September 13, 2018 What's a Hurricane's favorite game... Twister... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 13, 2018 Share Posted September 13, 2018 What's the difference between a dog and a fox... About eight pints of Cerveza... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian_at_HHH 2,610 Posted September 13, 2018 Share Posted September 13, 2018 1 hour ago, randog311 said: About eight pints of Cerveza... ... or maybe less... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 13, 2018 Share Posted September 13, 2018 11 minutes ago, Brian_at_HHH said: ... or maybe less... I suppose it depends on the Breed of Dog you start with ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 14, 2018 Share Posted September 14, 2018 Judge: "Why did you steal the Car?" Man: "I had to get to work" Judge: "Why didn't you take the Bus?" Man: "I don't have a License to drive a Bus"... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 14, 2018 Share Posted September 14, 2018 "Why do Women rub their eyes when they wake up?"... 'They don't have a sack to scratch" ... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 15, 2018 Share Posted September 15, 2018 Child: "Mom, where do Tampons go?" Mother: "Where the babies come from darling, in the Stork."... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 15, 2018 Share Posted September 15, 2018 "My Girlfriend used to smoke after sex, so we started using lube." - Jimmy Carr 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 15, 2018 Share Posted September 15, 2018 "I tried to change my Password to Pennis but they said it was too short". - Unknown 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrummerJuice 1,279 Posted September 15, 2018 Share Posted September 15, 2018 (edited) "Why do they make disposable douche?" "Who wants to keep that shit around! Edited September 15, 2018 by DrummerJuice Appearance 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 15, 2018 Share Posted September 15, 2018 From the most Interesting Man in the World (in Michigan): "I don't always avoid Pot Holes"... "But when I do, I hit four more"... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 15, 2018 Share Posted September 15, 2018 (edited) "I'm on a Whiskey Diet, I've lost 3 Days already." - Tommy Cooper Edited September 15, 2018 by randog311 Spelling 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 15, 2018 Share Posted September 15, 2018 "The people that Vote for the Oscars are so old. I haven't seen one Academy Award Voter with a Tampon in her purse." - Joan Rivers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 16, 2018 Share Posted September 16, 2018 A man is being arrested by a Female Police Officer, She informes the Gentleman that: "Anything He says, can and will be held against Him"... Gentlemen: "Boobs" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 16, 2018 Share Posted September 16, 2018 Do you wonder why they call it a "Wonder Bra?"... When you take it off, you wonder where the Tits went... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 16, 2018 Share Posted September 16, 2018 (edited) So what if I don't know what "Armageddon" means? It's not the end of the world... Edited September 16, 2018 by randog311 Added Quotation marks 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 17, 2018 Share Posted September 17, 2018 Two Blonde friends are taking a nature hike when they came upon a set of tracks, one Blonde says: "I think these are Bear tracks." Other Blonde says: "I think these are Deer Tracks. " They were still arguing when the Train hit them... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 18, 2018 Share Posted September 18, 2018 To be happy with a Man, you should Understand Him a lot and Love Him a little... To be happy with a Woman, you should Love Her a lot and not Understand Her at all... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 20, 2018 Share Posted September 20, 2018 I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker... But when I got to his home, all the signs were there... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 21, 2018 Share Posted September 21, 2018 Women spend more time thinking about what Men are thinking than Men spend thinking... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randog311 7,223 Posted September 21, 2018 Share Posted September 21, 2018 Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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